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10 Fears Birth Mothers Have About Open Adoption (And Why You Don’t Need to Fear Each)

By Tyra Watts

Pregnancy is arguably one of the most explorative experiences that a woman can go through within nine months. As the birth mother, you have many options and decisions that you can make, with adoption being one of them. Although adoption is a great choice for many birth mothers, some birth mothers do have a lot of fears and concerns. At Adoption Choices of Kansas, we are here to tell you that there is nothing to fear regarding adoption. Choosing adoption is not giving up. If you need unplanned pregnancy help now, Adoption Choices of Kansas serves birth parents statewide and beyond. We can help with teen pregnancy, financial assistance, difficult situations, and more. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call Us at 877-903-4488 or Text Us at 316-209-2071.

What Is An Open Adoption?

Open adoption is one of the three types of adoption (the other two being semi-open and closed adoptions) that Kansas adoption agencies offer. It is the most common adoption plan used among birth mothers. With open adoption, you can meet the adoptive parents and share personal information such as phone numbers and other methods to reach out. Then, after the adoption has been finalized, you have the opportunity to check in on your child via in-person visits. 

10 Fears Birth Mothers Have About Open Adoption (And Why You Don’t Need to Fear Each)

  1. “What If I Don’t See My Child Post-Adoption?”

    As stated earlier, after the adoption is finalized, you do have the opportunity to have in-person visits with your child. You can bring other family members such as grandparents to these in-person visits. Not only that, but you can also call and write letters to your child to see how they are. It is important to ensure that you and the adoptive parents have the same understanding of “openness” when it comes to the child’s needs. 

  2.  “I Can’t Afford The Adoption Process”

    If you are facing pregnancy and you want to place your child for adoption but cannot afford it, Adoption Choices of Kansas will provide financial assistance. This includes rent and utilities, food, transportation, groceries, and much more. After you explain your financial situation to your Adoption Counselor, adoption agencies in Kansas will begin working on getting the financial help that you need. 

  3. “I Am A Bad Mom For Placing My Child for Adoption”

    This is one of the most common fears birth mothers have regarding adoption. However, this is not true at all. Here at Adoption Choices of Kansas, birthmothers are treated with respect and dignity. We can assure you that your decision to place your child for adoption does not make you a bad mother. If anything, it is the complete opposite. By choosing adoption, you are putting your child first and showing adoption agencies in Kansas that you want what’s best for them. As an adoption agency, we will do our best to place your child in a safe and loving home. 

  4.  “How Will Others React to My Decision?”

    This is another common fear for birth mothers and adoption. Although not everyone will be happy with your decision to put a child up for adoption, what matters most is the people in your life who support your decision. It is very important to have people around you who will be there for you in every step of the adoption process. 

  5. “The Adoption Process Itself Is A Lot”

    Adoption Choices of Kansas comes to meet you as a responsive and trusting agency to work with. When you start an adoption plan, you will have an Adoption Counselor assigned to you to help you in each step. This includes choosing the adoptive parents, creating a birth plan, going to your doctor’s appointments, and much more. You will not face this adoption alone, as Kansas adoption agencies will be there for you 100%.

  6. “What If The Adoptive Parents Do Not Love My Child?”

    It is understandable why many birth mothers fear that the adoptive parents will not love their child the way a birth mother would. However, imagine how the adoptive parents feel. You are allowing them to have a child of their own, so the adoptive parents are more than likely to do their best to protect and love their child. This is why open adoption is one of the best methods for adoption. You have the chance to get to know them, and it is up to you to decide whether or not they’ll be a great choice for your child. 

  7. “I Can’t Have Kids After Placing One for Adoption”

    Now, this is nothing further from the truth. If you believe that you are ready to be a mother, then there is nothing wrong with getting pregnant and having your own child. Unfortunately, many birth mothers resort to adoption because they are either not ready to become a mother, they cannot afford to take care of a child, or it is simply not the right time. After you place your child for adoption, if you think you are ready to take on motherhood, you should go for it.

  8. Lack Of Support

    As previously stated, Kansas adoption agencies will provide financial support if you are interested in placing your child for adoption but cannot afford it. Besides financial support, Adoption Choices of Kansas helps the mom with various resources such as counseling support. In addition, we know that adoption can take a toll on birth mothers, so we will provide a caseworker to be by your side for emotional support. 

  9. “My Child Will Hate Me for Putting Them Up for Adoption”

    This is not true for many reasons. For starters, if you decide on using the open adoption plan, you will still have contact with the child and the adoptive parents. Another reason is that the adoptive parents will most likely explain to your child why you’ve placed them for adoption. At some point, your child will begin to understand why. An additional reason why this statement is false is that your child may have questions about the adoption and would want to contact you for answers. As stated earlier, your child may understand why you made that decision. 

  10.  “I Have To Face The Adoption Process Alone”

    No, you do not. Adoption Choices of Kansas will be there for you and your child every step of the way. To get started on how to put a child up for adoption, you can reach out to us at 877-903-4488 or Text Us at 316-209-2071. You can also check out Kansas adoption agencies near me.  

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