4 Myths about Birth Mothers You Should Stop Believing Now
Myths. They have been used to pass stories, assumptions and stereotypes down from one generation to the next. They may help us understand people’s history or beliefs, but it’s important not to pay close attention to them. Myths can become a problem because they often paint a certain group of people in a negative light. One such group to suffer from this is birth mothers.
Certain myths have painted birth mothers in such a negative light, that women almost seem to be shamed for an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption. But now, these myths have to end. It’s time for the truth to be revealed. Here are four myths about birth mothers that you can stop believing now.
- Myth: Birth Mothers Don’t Care about Their Child
That couldn’t be further from the truth. Imagine having a baby growing inside of you. Think of the morning sickness, swollen feet and myriad of other issues you’d endure during pregnancy. Now, picture going through hours of labor. Would you do that if you didn’t love and care about their child? No, of course not.
Birth mothers always have the option of deciding how they are going to handle their pregnancy. They have three choices: parent their child, terminate their pregnancy or place their child for adoption. If you didn’t want the best for your child, and love him or her deeply, you would probably choose to terminate your pregnancy. Yet, birth mothers who choose to place their child for adoption do so out of love. They handpick their child’s adoptive parents and ensure the couple or individual will be the best fit out of love.
- Myth: Birth Mothers are Troubled Teenagers or Disadvantaged
While some birth mothers may be young or struggling with a personal, mental health or financial issue, this is far from the majority of birth mothers. In fact, many birth mothers who choose adoption for their child may already have children of their own or be high up in a professional career. Each and every birth mother is different, and it is unfair to put a generality on them.
No matter who you are or what your situation, know that our adoption agency sees you as valued and respected. We understand that your decision to place your baby for adoption isn’t an easy one and that you are doing what’s best for yourself and your child. That’s all that matters.
- Myth: Birth Mothers Move on and Forget about Their Child
This myth gives the impression that once a birth mother “gives up” her child, she will return to her everyday life and pretend like nothing happened. Yet, this is another instance that couldn’t be further from the truth.
No matter how you become a mother, you will always be a mother. You will continue to think of your child long after the adoption has been finalized and will go through a grieving process. Even if you are able to stay in contact with your child, it doesn’t take away the feelings you still have about the adoption.
Birth mothers do move on because they have to and they never forget their child.
- Myth: Birth Mothers Regret Their Decision and Come Back for Their Child
Placing your child into the hands of another family is one of the hardest things you will ever have to endure as a birth mother. But, by the time you’ve chosen adoption, you have given this decision a lot of thought. Although you may feel grief and loss for a while, you can take comfort in knowing you did the best you could for your child.
You understand that once the adoption is finalized, your child will be raised by their adoptive family. You’d never think of returning for your child because of the trauma it would cause everyone. Especially not after all the careful planning you did throughout your adoption journey, and the time you took selecting your child’s adoptive parents. As a birth mother, you know that although you may feel grief and loss for a while, you can take comfort in knowing you did what was best for your child.
Myths about Birth Mothers
It’s so important for these myths to be debunked as soon as possible. These negative connotations can cause a great amount of fear and cause you to not make the decision you know is right for both you and your child.
So, if you hear any of these myths or any others that cast a negative light on you as a birth mother, dismiss it. You deserve and have the right to make the decisions that are right for you and your child.
Meet the Author: Gabrielle Willis is a lover of writing and knowledge, which shows in her everyday life. She graduated with a Bachelors in English in 2013, and recently graduated with a Masters in Creative Writing. She has also worked in the education sector for over 10 years, recently becoming a Literacy Tutor. At her core, her passion is reading and writing, and she loves sharing that with others.
She enjoys helping those considering adoption or going through the adoption process any way she can. This internship opportunity truly resonated with her and she hopes that her words will connect and inspire everyone who reads them.