One of the most important decisions to make about adoption is the level of communication between birth parents and their children. Often, this can be a difficult discussion for adoptive parents and birth parents because of the emotions involved. However, it is important for birth parents to establish the level of openness that they want early on in the process, so that both the birth and adoptive parents can establish trust in their relationship, and can discuss the parameters of communication. Every adoption plan is unique, but in general, there are three main ways to establish communication levels between birth parents and their children.
- Closed Adoption: A closed adoption is the most extreme type of adoption. In this case, for whatever reason, the birth parent and child will have no communication once the adoption is finalized. This means that they will likely never see or communicate with their child again. There are many reasons why this can happen especially in regards to the adoption circumstances. Sometimes if mothers are incarcerated, very young, suffering from addiction, or geographically located in different states, countries, continents etc, people will choose closed adoptions. This type of adoption can be positive because children may not feel torn between both families. They will also be unaware of any negative family history. For birth parents, it might also provide the closure that they need. However, closed adoptions can also have some negative effects. There might be limited knowledge of medical history or family background. The child may also feel unwanted or confused about their identity. Like anything, there are significant pros and cons in choosing this route for adoption.
- Semi-Open Adoption: A semi-open adoption is another type of adoption. In this case, birth parents and their children have some contact with each other, but it is generally not face to face. This is the most fluid type of adoption because both the birth and adoptive parents establish specific parameters for contact. A semi-open adoption varies for each child and family. In general, birth parents will be able to communicate to their child through letters, pictures, or communication through a third-party source.
- Open Adoption: This is the last type of adoption. It has the most freedom for contact and communication between birth parents and children. In this type of adoption, birth parents can see their child in person and be able to have regular communication. This allows birth parents to have a relationship with their child and allows children to learn about their history and family. This can be very beneficial because the child will be able to know their birth parents and be able to ask questions. The birth parents will also be able to see their child grow and be a part of their life. However, this may also lead the child to feel torn between their adoptive and birth parents. This also may lead to tension for everyone involved.
Ultimately, there are different types of adoptions. It is important to decide on what is the best situation for yourself and your child. Adoption Choices of Kansas & Missouri can help! Serving Expectant Parents Statewide, Call Us 877-903-4488 or
Text Us 316-209-2071