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What is Birth Mother Grief, and How Can You Overcome It?

By Melissa Camacho

If you are a birth mother dealing with an unplanned pregnancy, you may be going through intense feelings of grief and loss. There is no reason to feel guilty for your emotions. It can be tough to make when you are putting a child up for adoption. The team here at Adoption Choices of Kansas understands the hardships surrounding your right to choose adoption. It’s essential for us to help you manage your birth mother grief and frustration that affects you mentally and physically. We will provide you with steps to feel confident and hopeful about your decision to choose adoption.

If you need adoption help now, please call us at 877-903-4488, text us at 316-209-2071, or visit us at Adoption Choices of Kansas.

What Causes a Birth Mother’s Grief and Loss During Adoption?

When you are giving a baby up for adoption, you suddenly begin to feel you failed as a mother. Feelings of self-doubt, shock, and trauma begin to develop. You may experience a hard time validating an unexpected step during your pregnancy–adoption. Not only do you have fear for your well-being, but also your child. You start to feel you won’t be appreciated as your child grows. There are times that you will feel misjudged because some people still have yet to learn about adoption. Sometimes you feel misunderstood by people you know because they may disagree with your decision to pursue adoption. Other factors that may impact your mental health are lack of support, including financial and emotional support. 

Ways A Birth Mother Can Cope and Overcome Grief

Feeling grief over placing your baby for adoption can feel like losing a close relative or a special friend. So naturally, it takes time to move along the path to positivity. It’s important not to be hard on yourself before taking these steps towards enlightenment over grief:

Think of Ways You Can Still Bond With Your Child

If you choose to have an open adoption plan, you can have many precious moments with your child. For example, if you celebrate birthdays or holidays, think of how you will surprise your child. You can meet up with the adoptive family, bring gifts, have dinner, and spend time with your child. Set up reminders on your calendar app or keep a journal of dates and events you plan to spend with your child. 

Acknowledge You Are Doing The Right Thing By Choosing Adoption in Kansas

During the adoption process, it’s normal to be wary and emotional. As a birth mother, you have come to a realization that you won’t be able to keep your child due to unfortunate circumstances. However, you are a responsible birth mother who is making a sacrifice to find the best adoptive parent for your baby. Every adoption professional at your local adoption agency knows adoption is not an easy process. It takes time to get past your grief and start moving in the right direction–you decide not to give up. Nothing matters more than your baby being raised by adoptive parents in a healthy and loving environment.

Get Counseling Support with Adoption Agencies in Kansas

With Adoption Choices of Kansasyou are never alone managing your pain and frustration. Remember, we recognize your effort in choosing an adoption plan that will work for you and your baby. Our adoption agencies in Kansas are staffed with licensed social workers and counselors who will help you cope with grief. To get more information regarding our counseling services, call 877-903-4488 or text us at (316) 209-2071.

We Will, Continue To Guide You Through Post-Placement Services With Kansas Adoption 

Financial hardships have a significant impact on a birth mother’s mental health. It is our job to comfort you but to keep you in your comfort zone throughout your adoption journey. We encourage you to take advantage of any support services available to you. Adoption Choices of Kansas will not back down on you. You can count on us to continue to assist you with your needs. Every birth mother’s needs vary, and yes–we have resources to accommodate them. After your birth delivery, we can provide financial support for up to six weeks for the following expenses:

  • Housing and/or rent
  • Medical or Hospital 
  • Transportation for traveling to school, work, stores, and any appointments, including medical
  • Utility Bills
  • Food and Groceries

In addition, we will still have counseling and therapy services available for you in support of your mental health. Don’t hesitate to call 877-903-4488 or text us at (316) 209-2071 to learn more about counseling during and after your adoption plan.

Adoption Choices of Kansas Cares…Because You Care!

Adoption Choices of Kansas wants you to understand how important it is to manage pain and stress during your pregnancy. We take pride in your strength and happiness throughout the adoption process. The love and care your child will experience with a new family wouldn’t be possible without you. Our work is to ensure your needs in placing your baby for adoption are met. If you are willing to improve and preserve your mental health, you are on your way to a successful adoption journey. 

Adoption Agencies in Kansas Are Built to Support The Wellness of Birth Mothers 

A birth mother’s mental health sustains the love and development through her adoption journey. Choosing adoption is not giving up. If you need unplanned pregnancy help now, Adoption Choices of Kansas serves birth parents statewide and beyond. We can help with teen pregnancy, financial assistance, difficult situations, and more. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call Us 877-903-4488 or Text Us 316-209-2071  

References 
“Birth Mother Grief – Deeply Painful But Often Unacknowledged” Grief and Sympathy,  https://www.griefandsympathy.com/birth-mother-grief.html. Accessed 02 May 2022

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