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Choosing Adoption in a Bad Relationship

By Laysha Macedo

The state of one’s relationship is important when considering welcoming a new baby. Relationship struggles can be difficult to overcome. Whether it’s incompatibility, infidelity or anything else, dealing with issues with a partner can be incredibly stressful. Facing an unplanned pregnancy can add stress to this relationship. A pregnancy should be a happy experience, something the mother and father are in a good place to care for. This otherwise positive experience can be distressful if the relationship has reached a point too unstable or even unsafe to welcome a child. In these circumstances, you may need to find a way out of the relationship. Many women have faced this struggle, so know you are not alone in this situation. 

During this time of decision-making, you may consider the parental rights of the birth father and how the adoption process begins. All of these questions can be overwhelming. At Adoption Choices of Kansas, we hope to answer your questions and provide you with the information you need to make your decision.

What About the Birth Father’s Parental Rights?

This question depends on different factors such as marital status, state, and whether or not the father wants to challenge the adoption. Every person’s situation is different. Depending on your circumstances, the need for the birth father’s consent varies. As you consider adoption, meeting with an adoption counselor or attorney may be the best route to get your questions answered. In some cases there are specific steps to follow in order to terminate the birth father’s parental rights. In cases of abuse, the father may not be considered for consent for the adoption at all.

Choosing Adoption

Once you have sought counsel or legal advice on your situation, creating an adoption plan is the first step in the process. Seeking help from an adoption counselor will get you started. Through talks with your adoption counselor you can learn more about the adoption process and together, make your plan. 

Among the decisions you’ll make is choosing what kind of adoption you want—closed, semi-open, and open. You will also determine who the parents of the child will be and so on. With an adoption plan in place, things will be able to run more smoothly. Along with choosing adoption, through counseling, you’ll get an understanding of the emotional toll that comes with the decision. While it is important to know the step-by-step process, understanding the emotional part is just as important. 

As a birth mother you may experience grief from placing your baby for adoption. This is a completely valid response to the process. After carrying the child for nine months, some birth mothers can experience the loss of the child more intensely than others. This is why it is important to be aware of what can be expected from the adoption process. Furthermore, you should consider physical—such as prenatal care—and financial care. The adoption process can take so much time and work from the birth mother. Being aware of what may come up during this time is a priority when choosing adoption.

Resources for Adoption

It is through your adoption counselor that you may be able to gain access to a multitude of resources to help you through anything you need. As mentioned before, the emotional toll of this process can be a lot for one person to handle. During this time, you can access support groups and other mental health services to talk through and cope with emotions that surface. You may also access basic needs if you find yourself struggling financially. From help with transportation to groceries, we can help you to ease your load during this overwhelming process. 

Support also exists beyond the adoption finalization. You can also access support post-placement if you need help with housing or even continued mental health support.

Adoption Choices is Here to Help

Relationships can be difficult and even more so with an unplanned pregnancy. Struggling through issues with parental rights and getting the adoption process started can be a lot. It is important to know that you are not alone and while difficult, you will absolutely get through this process. Here, at Adoption Choices of Kansas, we hope to provide you with the support that you need during this time. If you are a birth mother looking for adoption agencies in Kansas, reach out to us. You can also research adoption agencies and Wichita adoption services near you. 

Para obtener más información sobre la adopción de bebés y agencias de adopción, asegúrese de comunicarse con nosotros.

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