Different Child, Same Home: Placing Your Second Baby With The Same Adoptive Family in Kansas
At Adoption Choices of Kansas, we are always thrilled to discover that our birth and adoptive family matches are effective and beneficial for all parties involved. This is why we love to support you in placing your second baby with the same adoptive family. The bonds, trust, and familiarity created with the adoptive family that cares for your first child can make the decision feel like a no-brainer for many parents. For those unsure of why the decision might be made to put two children with the same adoptive family, here are a few of the most popular reasons.
Why Would Someone Want To Place Their Second Child with The Same Adoptive Family As Their First?
- They have a strong bond with the adoptive family- We have all heard the old saying “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.” It can be used to explain anything from refusing to update your phone to why you feel you want to give your child to the same adoptive family that your firstborn is in. If the adoptive parents are a good fit for your child and your needs, why pick another? Once the first child is placed, many birth parents tend to create a meaningful and lasting bond with the adoptive family.
Depending on how long after the first child is born that the second has arrived, some families spend years strengthening and developing this bond. In open or semi-open adoptions, the relationship can be crafted by the exchange of photos and letters for years post-placement. Even in a closed adoption, birth parents can meet the adoptive family pre-placement and receive the comfort and peace of mind that is provided by the adoption caseworker’s post-placement report given to the court. Even without having continued communication with your child’s new family, you can still have a great deal of trust in them and their ability to provide satisfactory care.
- Availability– While there are often dozens of waiting families looking to adopt a child in Kansas on any given day, this may not always be the case. The strict timeline of the pregnancy process can sometimes create an equally strict timeline for the birth parents to find an adoptive family. For this reason, some parents may choose to give their second child to the same adoptive parents as their first in order to eliminate the stress and anxiety that finding a different yet fitting family would possibly provide.
Again, they are used to the adoptive family and have gone through the process with them before, which can make it an easier and more time-efficient experience than trying to find a second home. Location is also a factor. If the adoptive parents are closer to you than any other prospective parents, you may choose to give your second child to them so that they can remain close.
- They want to keep the siblings together– Many birth parents enjoy the idea of allowing their children to remain with their brothers and sisters throughout their lives. It can make it easier for birth parents to keep track of their children’s development and wellbeing if they are in the same place. With open and semi-open adoptions, having both children in one home can allow birth parents to receive updates of letters and photos that involve both their children.
Down the line, having both children of the same blood and birth parents together can make the adoptive family feel more natural. It can also make the inevitable discussion of their adopted origins with them a bit easier and straightforward. After all, a child may feel less alienated in their new home if their siblings come from the same place as them. Imagine if Superman had other babies from Krypton with him to make him feel more at home!
- The birth parents could receive benefits for placing their second child in the same home as the first– Placing your child with their sibling could potentially classify the second adoption as a “special needs adoption.” In this case, a Kansas special needs adoption or private adoption assistance would apply if either the first or second child placed together is six years old or older or has an emotional, learning, or physical disability that would limit their development and require special care.
Alternatively, if the children placed are under six and have no discernable disabilities, but three or more siblings are placed together total, they may also be eligible for assistance. This assistance includes, but is not limited to, the provision of health care, monthly payments, or reimbursements to cover the care of the child. By placing your child with Kansas adoption assistance, you are helping their adoptive family provide the best care they can for them.
- The adoptive family is looking for a second child– Occasionally, birth parents will discover that the family that they placed their first child with, is looking to expand their family. When this happens, if the birth parents are still not prepared to care for a child themselves, they will give the child to the adoptive parents. In the end, both sets of parents get to have the futures they desire.
What to Remember When Placing Your Second Child with the Same Adoptive Family
While your second adoption process may feel familiar, it also brings with it a few different opportunities. One of these options is to collaborate with the family who adopted your first child on the possibility of adopting your second. As with any collaboration, the key element involved is effective communication. Make sure that the adoptive family is not only willing to take your second child but that they also have the resources to do so. It is important to remember that just because they can care for your first child, does not mean they are equipped to care for the second. The good news is that Adoption Choices of Kansas can help you approach the adoptive family and lead a discussion on the matter. But we can only assist you if you reach out, so call today!
Meet the Author: Peter is a writer and editor based in New York. Currently studying at Binghamton University, Peter is majoring in English Literature and Rhetoric. Whether working with Marketing Choices or the mental health blog, Runaway, Peter seeks to provide comfort and warmth to those around him through his writing. A huge advocate for change, Peter looks to promote adoption, mental health awareness, disability awareness, and environmental improvement. Forever looking to make meaningful connections, Peter can be found with a group of friends or going on walks and waving to anyone he passes.