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Kansas Adoption: Unwrapping Birth Parent Holiday Joy and Grief 

By Syd Sukalski

Considering adoption, I can’t take care of my baby.” You’ve made this google search. You’ve decided on adoption. We understand. It’s a difficult decision, and you feel the grief that many birth mothers feel after placing their child for adoption. This grief can feel even more pronounced if you place your child for adoption during the holidays. The holidays can be difficult for everybody, especially if you are feeling some of the grief that so often comes along with placing your child for adoption. This feeling might manifest even more than usual around the holidays because of the emphasis on the family unit. But don’t worry. In this article, we’ll talk about a couple of ways you can banish those holiday blues. 

Private Adoption Agency in Kansas

Adoption Choices of Kansas is a private adoption agency that wants to help you with your adoption process. We are a responsive and trusting agency to work with, and all of our birth mothers are treated with respect and dignity. Adoption Choices of Kansas comes to meet you. Anywhere you live in the state, we will schedule a meeting with you and see you there. If you are considering adoption in Kansas, want help with your adoption plan, or are wondering how adoption works, check out our Wichita adoption agencies or our adoption agencies near you.

Support for Birth Mothers for Grief During the Holidays

Adoption Choices of Kansas helps the mom with various resources. One of these resources is our counseling and support center. Counseling and support groups are available to our birth mothers, and if you need them during the holidays, please let us know. We are here to help you. If your adoption plan consisted of a closed or semi-open adoption, or even if you had an open adoption, you might feel some significant grief around the holidays due to the separation from your birth child. It might feel like nobody around you understands what you’re going through, so please, reach out to us. We help you with your grief and connect you with other grieving birth mothers in support groups, so you can talk with people who truly understand what you’re going through.

Sharing Your Holiday Traditions with Your Birth Child and Their Adoptive Family

If your adoption plan consists of an open adoption, you might consider sharing some of your family holiday traditions with which you would like your birth child to grow up. This experience can be a great way to create a warm environment between you and your birth child’s family and to help you get rid of some of those holiday blues. You might consider asking to decorate a Christmas tree together, using ornaments from both of your collections to create a tree for your combined family. Maybe you love to drive around and look at the holiday lights, and you want to share this adoration with your birth child. You might bake Christmas cookies, build a gingerbread house, or watch your favorite holiday movies! Sure, some of these traditions might seem wasted on a baby, but by setting this precedent early on, you can create a tradition with your birth child and their family, so you always have something to connect with during the holidays. 

Birth Mothers, Be Kind to Yourself This Holiday Season!

The adoption process and the holiday season can be challenging, but remember to be kind to yourself. One of the factors which can contribute to grief after placing your child for adoption is a sense of failure or “giving up,” but you haven’t given up anything! You have not failed! Phrases like “putting my child up for adoption,” “adopt out my baby,” and “giving my baby up for adoption” can all have negative connotations. But you have given a wonderful gift this holiday season! Time and energy has been spent on an adoption plan for your birth child. You helped create a family! Birth parents have done something generous and noble, so give yourself the gift of kindness this holiday season.

Of course, we know this can be easier said than done, so if you’re unwrapping a big box of grief this holiday season, please reach out to us. We offer counseling and support groups to all birth parents.

Adoption Choices of Kansas maintains private adoption agencies across the state, and we want to help you with your Kansas adoption plan. 

Remember: choosing adoption is not giving up. If you need unplanned pregnancy help now, Adoption Choices of Kansas serves birth parents statewide and beyond. We can help with teen pregnancy, financial assistance, difficult situations, and more. Please call us or text us to learn more! Call Us at 877-903-4488 or Text Us at 316-209-2071.

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