Pros and Cons of Open Adoption
Weighing the pros and cons is an important part of the decision making process. It is natural and perfectly okay to carefully consider the good and the bad when making any decision! Especially with adoption, it shows that you are open minded, ready to educate yourself, and dedicated to the adoption journey.
Cons of Open Adoption
- One of the biggest drawbacks to open adoption is the possibility that the relationship will not work out. Birth mothers fear the adoptive families will change their minds and disappear from their lives or vice versa.
- There is less anonymity in open adoption. In an open adoption arrangement, there is less privacy for birth mothers. Open adoption typically involves an exchange of some identifying information, which can include names, email addresses, or phone numbers.
- Some birth parents feel pressured to keep in touch, even when it is not in their best interest. Sometimes, birth parents initially feel they want fully open plans and later find that they cannot move forward in their lives with the amount of ongoing contact. They may feel pressured to continue communication so as not to offend the adoptive family.
Pros of Open Adoption
- Open adoption gives you the opportunity to select a family to raise your child. This is one of the most loving decisions an expectant/birth mom can make for her baby and this opportunity to form a relationship with your child and his or her parents is priceless.
- Removal of shame and secrecy that can sometimes accompany adoption.
- Better access to family medical information. Everyone, at one point or another, has come across a trait or illness that seemed to come out of the blue only to discover that a relative had the same condition. Having an open adoption can make it easier to weather such storms since contact between the adoptive family and biological family is open. Biological family members can be great sources of knowledge when dealing with sudden or even chronic conditions that may suddenly appear in the adoptive child.
- The child will be able to understand their background and history, and can ask questions. Open adoption alleviates the “where did I come from” for some children since the biological parents are still involved and able to give that reassurance that the child had always been and will always be cared for.
While it is encouraged that you consider an open adoption, it is always up to you to decide what type of post-adoption relationship you want to have with the adoptive family and your child. There is no right or wrong choice when it comes to contact for your adoption. It’s important to take care of yourself, and do what’s best for yourself and your family. Adoption Choices of Kansas encourages some level of openness but the choice is always yours! To discuss more, give us a ring at 1-877-903-4488
