Semi-Open Adoption Pros and Cons
During an unplanned pregnancy, you may feel confused and conflicted, especially if you aren’t ready for a baby. You may think about how much responsibility it is to raise a child and feel overwhelmed. Just know that those feelings are completely valid and not out of the ordinary. With a baby comes putting your life on hold, and that may not be something you are ready for. Adoption Choices of Kansas encourages you to consider adoption as an option if you are having doubts during your unplanned pregnancy.
If you are thinking about putting your child up for adoption, one of the types of adoption to consider is semi-open adoption. If you are unfamiliar with this, don’t worry. We are here to give you more information on semi-open adoption pros and cons.
What is Semi-Open Adoption?
There are three different types of adoption you can choose for your adoption journey. Some birth mothers prefer to have a closed adoption, meaning they are not in contact with their child whatsoever. Others choose to have an open adoption, where the birth mother is in contact with her child, as well as the adoptive family.
In a semi-open adoption, the birth mother may be in contact with her child and the adoptive family, however a third party must be involved during communication. The contact can be in the form of emails, letters, pictures or phone calls, and the third party is usually the adoption agency. This may offer more privacy for both the birth mother and the adoptive family.
Through our adoption agency, we use a private, secure online portal called ChildConnect. This allows you to exchange information and receive updates about your child from a safe distance. At Adoption Choices of Kansas, we will gladly facilitate any type of communication in a semi-open adoption, if this is the route you choose to take.
Cons of Semi-Open Adoption
In a semi-open adoption, there can be many positives, depending on the expectations you have and the type of relationship you would like to maintain with your child and the adoptive family. However, there may be some negatives with this type of adoption as well. Here are several potential cons that may come with a semi-open adoption.
- Loss of Relationship with Your Child
With a semi-open adoption, you may have less contact with your child and adoptive family than you would in an open adoption. Your identity may be kept private from your child and the adoptive family, which means that there will be little relationship between you and them as you will not fully get to meet and know them. As a result, you could feel grief and loss from a relationship that you could have otherwise had.
- Increased Grief
Because there will be little contact between you and your child/adoptive family, you may have an increased sense of grief as you give your child up for adoption. There may be a heavier loss and mourning period for you while you process the thought of not being able to meet your child as they grow up and navigate life. Putting a child up for adoption can be emotionally taxing. But, knowing that you won’t meet them and see a unique part of them that resembles you, can be even more emotionally taxing and make the adoption process harder for you.
- Feelings of Obligation and Guilt
You may feel obligated to put your child up for adoption and have minimal contact. These feelings can come about when you feel as if your presence will make it more complicated on your child and the adoptive family. You may think that their lives will be more stable and better off without you in it. This may cause feelings of guilt and the need to be less present in the life of your child and adoptive family.
Pros of Semi-Open Adoption
Putting your child up for adoption can be a very conflicting journey. You may feel as if you would like contact with your child to know how they are doing while growing up, but still do not want to carry the responsibility of being too present in his or her life. This is where semi-open adoption can be a positive choice for you. It allows you more personal freedom while still having updates throughout your child’s life.
- Seeing Your Child Grow from Afar
With a semi-open adoption, you can receive updates on how your child is doing. This can be a positive thing as you will be able to see your child grow up and know a part of him or her. Through ChildConnect, you can see their personality, passions, and check in on their well-being. This can cause a sense of peace, knowing that your child is doing well and reaffirm that you made the right choice.
- Increased Privacy for You
If you want to receive updates on your child and have a peace of mind about him or her, but don’t want the pressure or obligation to have an ongoing relationship with them, a semi-open adoption can be a positive adoption option for you. Semi-open adoption creates a sense of privacy and allows you to maintain your personal life without having to share who you are with your child and the adoptive family.
- Positive Questions
Having a semi-open adoption can be positive for both your child and the adoptive family, as it leaves a line of communication open between you and them. So, if your birth child or their adoptive parents have any questions, you can provide answers for them. They will also be able to reach you if there are any medical emergencies and need your family history. This will not only benefit your child’s health, but could also, ultimately, assist him or her in the long run.
Is Semi-Open Adoption the Right Adoption Option for You?
Adoption Choices of Kansas strives to give you many options during your adoption journey to see what will best fit your life, wants, and needs. A semi-open adoption is an option you have, depending on how you envision your post adoption placement and what will best benefit you. You have the power to decide which route you would like to take, and we are here to provide you with what will make you the happiest.
Meet the Author: Tatiana is a graduate of Saint Mary’s College of California where she pursued a degree in Business with a concentration in Marketing. She first discovered her passion for journalism in high school when she joined Yearbook, allowing her to interview others and learn their intricacies, ultimately giving them a voice. Her empathetic nature motivates her to write about others and be interested in details of each individual and their story.
Tatiana’s passion for writing deepened when she took a college journalism class, which allowed her to write various types of content consisting of Feature Story, Review, and Profile pieces. She went on to hone her writing and marketing skills through her position as a Marketing Associate at the Lesher Arts Center in Walnut Creek, CA, where she managed social media content and advertising assets. In her free time, Tatiana enjoys writing poetry and her thoughts about philosophy. She explores her creative and musical side through instruments, singing, and nature.