Three Tips and Pieces of Advice for Single Adoptive Dads
Just like with birth mothers, the adoption process for a single dad can be challenging. Perhaps you do not know what it’s like being a father, but you have a general idea. Maybe you want to be a dad, but could fear judgement from others. Maybe you are considering fatherhood, but you feel like you are at a disadvantage, because you do not know what it means to physically be pregnant. However, we are here to tell you that single dads can be just as great parents as single moms and adoptive parents.
Whatever the case may be, we want you to know that being a single, successful adoptive father is possible and well worth it. Today, we have three tips and pieces of advice for single dads that we want to share with you.
Tip #1: Get Yourself out There
Sometimes, one of the hardest steps for a potential adoptive father is getting himself known. Potential adoptive parents do not just walk into an agency, say that they want to adopt and then walk out as an adoptive family thirty minutes later. The same thing goes for single adoptive parents.
As a prospective single father, it is important that you reach out to Adoption Choices of Kansas and inform us of your desire to adopt. We will talk to you and get to know you. You might want to consider your personal interests, your career or career goals, along with what your prospective baby’s goals for the future should be. You should also be prepared to submit an image of yourself.
Birth mothers are always looking for prospective single adoptive parents that fit the criteria that they are looking for. Your baby’s birth mother will not know who you are, and what your goals for your baby are, without telling us first. Afterwards, we will publish a brief biography and your picture online. This helps birth mothers to ultimately think about a match.
Tip #2: Get a Feel for what Your Personal Goals are with Raising a Baby
It is not only vital that you consider goals that you want for your baby, but it is also important that you think about what your personal goals are for the entirety of your adoption process. What exactly is it that you want to get out of fatherhood? Why are you passionate about adoption? What if the birth mother has twins? All of these questions can help you to self-evaluate yourself and your goals.
When you answer these questions, think about how these can relate to your own goals for adoption. If you put yourself out there on a positive foot, you show a birth mother that you are dedicated and have the level of self-confidence that she may be looking for. Single fatherhood can be tough, but it is smoother after you have taken the time to consider your own personal goals.
Tip #3: Remember to Communicate
It doesn’t matter whether or not you are single when it comes to communication. If you follow along with our blogs, we recently said this about communication: “Without open communication, your adoption process will go on a long vacation!” What exactly does this mean? As a prospective single adoptive father, it is very important that you maintain an open communication process with your future baby’s birth mother. She has chosen you for a reason. If you were to ghost her, she may think that you no longer have an interest in adopting your child. If she does the same thing to you, you may most likely also start to worry about what’s going on and develop feelings of stress and anxiety as a result.
The number one thing that we do not want to happen to you is to see your adoption fall through, because you and your future baby’s birth mother stopped communicating. We are very clear when we mean not communicating with one another regularly can break your adoption. Of course, we do not want that to happen. But remember. Social media exists. Skype and ZOOM exist. Calling and texting exist. Adoption Choices of Kansas is always available for extra support if you need us.
Will My Adoption as a Single Father Work if I Follow These Tips?
Absolutely! The adoption process is not easy to navigate for anyone involved. This not only includes the birth mother, but you as well. We know that you have feelings that range from stress to excitement. However, you need to remember that the more you worry, the harder your adoption process will be. Putting yourself out there, recognizing your personal goals for adoption, and developing an open communication process, can all help you to succeed as a single adoptive father.
Single fatherhood is something that we at Adoption Choices of Kansas value and take to heart. We promise that your adoption process will prove to be very successful, if you follow the three tips and pieces of advice for single dads that we mentioned. Remember that just like with birth mothers, we are here for you as well! Please see our contact information below for further assistance.
Meet the Author: Jason Legasse is a rising senior English major studying at Siena College in Loudonville, New York. He hails from the Albany, New York area, but has plans to relocate to sunny Venice, Florida with his mom come Fall. After completing his bachelor’s degree, Jason plans to study General Special Education at Meredith College, where he will earn a Master’s degree and use that to teach middle school Special Education. Jason is a self-proclaimed introvert with Asperger’s who really enjoys writing. He has a huge passion for helping others, specifically those with disabilities.